Triggered-
By the photos
Posted online
Of all of you together-
Smiling, laughing,
Adventuring, and living it up.
Triggered-
Because there was a time
When I was right there
Beside you in the mix,
Sharing in all the laughs,
Jokes and shenanigans.
I miss it.
Triggered-
Because I still
Don’t totally understand
Exactly why it happened.
Only that it did.
And only that it remains-
Forever changed.
Triggered-
Because I’m no longer
On the inside.
No longer a regular part
Of your everyday lives.
And I still feel like
I’m stuck in the dark.
Wondering why.
Triggered-
Because so much
About my life has changed
Since overcoming
Breast cancer.
And the change in
Friendships-
Has been incredibly
Difficult for me to accept.
But I’m trying my best
To get it.
And even harder
To just let it.
I understand
That I’m not the person
I used to be.
I struggle to this day
To feel carefree-
Like I used to be.
But I’m doing my best
Every day
To hold my head high
And smile my way through
The sadness that overcomes
My heart when I am
Triggered.
-Tanielle Childers ©️8.31.25
dreamer | artist | painter | poet 